I Walked Through Those Days

I can't really remember, even if I  

Wanted to just pick a memory
At will, it's all
Lost to time. When I was a
Kid, that's all that I was. 
Everything seemed to matter. Even things that
Didn't. 

Those lose dreams of
Having something so
Real that we couldn't pretend anymore. 
One real, truly, honest thing. 
Unfolding, just for us. But nobody said it was
Going to be easy. Like an effortlessly warm
Hug. It'd just have been

Too easy. It'd be like those days in
High school when a simple crush became an
Obsession. Always
So out of reach. And the feeling that nobody would
Ever know me. The 

Days you seemed to be nice to me. I didn't know it was
All some joke to
You all. 
Sometimes I wish I had stayed there, or gone so far that I'd be here, already.