I Used To Write You Letters

I used to write you letters and kept them all, 

Unsent.You won't get to see them, read them, know what they 
Said. I couldn't 
Escape your energy and I know we are still connected and I secretly
Don't want to break it even though I had 

To walk away from you.You would not
Open up to me and you

Would not listen. You would not
Repair the damage and
I could not bear 
To be the object of your
Entertainment. I know 

You laughed and scoffed at me. You called me disgustingly
Optimistic when I had hopes of
Us having some semblance of a

Loving connection, but
Everyone 
Told me that
This was not healthy and I know it wouldn't have ended well.
Even though I still
Really love you and secretly still yearn for you to become sweet to me like
Some version of you I used to know....